There is a lot written about INFJs and their desire to find the ideal partner, to marry the perfect person or to have a life-time romance with their soulmate. It seems a common craving among INFJs.

Is this what you long for? Does the idea of being able to snuggle up to a beautiful partner who loves you fully, understands you deeply and who seems a perfect match, bring warmth to your heart?

If so, how can such a person be found?

The INFJ love match: Is there an ideal type?

What chances do we have of finding that love partner or the ideal INFJ type? In fact, does such a person exist or is it just a figment of our colourful imagination?

Many online MBTI sites feed us information about who this ideal type is and which type is best suited to the INFJ. Have we been fed exaggerations and lies on these MBTI sites? I am beginning to suspect so.

I am happily married and have been in love with my husband for many years. We are not the same type nor are we the so-called perfect match or the "Golden Pair". We didn't even meet in a place where I would ever have looked for my love partner.


I have repeatedly met INFJs who are married or living in a long-term relationship and are very happy. Yes, INFJs can be happily married or have a fulfilling life-partnership. INFJs don't have to end up living the single life, but some do through choice.

When fascinates me is that I find the personality types that INFJs marry or happily live with vary.

Problems occur when we search for just one type to fulfil our romantic ambitions. Are types such as INTPs, INFJs or ENTPs really our ideal match, for example, or are INFJs encouraged to look in the wrong place?

How would we recognise our ideal partner?

What are the characteristics of the kind of people who would best suit us? There are many individual differences but also some features common to many of us.

Sadly, some INFJs suffer from unrequited love because they have chosen the wrong person, or the person fails to meet their expectations and they are let-down.

Other INFJs don't know who they are looking for or where to find them. Worse still some don't even realise that Mister or Miss Right is standing right in front of them, they just swipe left. INFJs can miss their love match because they look for misleading signs or in lousy places.


What do INFJs need more of? Romance! That's how it is for me. When I have romance in abundance and I am loved and understood fully, I thrive.

Where do we find love and romance? I believe some places are better than others. Have you been looking on the internet? Going to a dating site? Hanging around groups in your local community? Or maybe just sitting at home wishing and hoping that you didn't feel so lonely.

Do you want a better partner? If so, you need to look for the authentic signs in the best places. Then you need to take the right steps to nurture the relationship and keep the love alive.

Do INFJs ruin relationships without meaning to?

It can be lonely without a wonderful person to come home to and share a life with, that is why finding the right type of person to love, who will appreciate us and remain faithful, is important.

The danger for us, as INFJs, is that once we have found our perfect partners we don't always keep them. Sometimes our relationships can end up in ruins.

Why is this? Could it be that we are not as tolerant and accepting of others’ standards and values as we think? Do we attach conditions to our partner's behaviour and expect our lovers to live up to unrealistically high expectations and values? We need to search deep inside to find the answers. We can be blind to our own failings and be miserable as a result and not know why. That's where "Planet INFJ" can assist.

Planet INFJ: The Book

How can you find your own ideal INFJ love match?

"Planet INFJ" will guide INFJs across the world to know how to look beyond the simple stereotypes of ideal type matches to find the deep love they long for.

  1. In "Planet INFJ" the whole of chapter 20 is devoted purely to romance and love for INFJs. It is called, "Finding romance, love and soulmates: when INFJ relationships work and fail". Much of what is written elsewhere about INFJs and their ideal partners is shown to be a scam. Instead, a set of expert contributors, all of them INFJs, will tell you the truth about their real lives to help you find love, romance and happiness in yours.
  2. There is much more in "Planet INFJ" to guide INFJs to better and happier relationships. For example, the way that we communicate with our partners makes an incredible difference to our levels of satisfaction and intimacy. How to develop the ability to communicate clearly is covered at length. In addition, each INFJ co-writer gives insights into their own personal stories and they describe how sometimes relationships, loyalty and love flourish, and at other times they fail. In chapter 10, David, a German INFJ, writes about "Fulfilled sexuality, love and romanticism". It isn't a straightforward journey – but then most of life isn't, especially for INFJs. That's why "Planet INFJ" was born: to ease the journey.
  3. When INFJs find the right partner their whole levels of contentment and fulfilment move up a notch – a big notch. That's why "Planet INFJ" is here to help.


Are you troubled because you want to be an authentic INFJ but find yourself being rebuffed, ridiculed or dismissed? Are you retreating into the safety of your own private world? If so, you risk becoming isolated or lonely and your wonderful INFJ strengths and gifts being wasted. Don't let this happen to you. "Planet INFJ" will help you find the perfect balance between being understood and accepted AND being an authentic INFJ.

Authenticity is the core value of INFJs; come join us on Planet INFJ, where authenticity reigns.